Marriage in its essence is a beautiful institution ordained to bring together two people who would be of help to each other as they journey towards living out their life’s purpose. Unfortunately, Marriage has been ascribed different meaning and in its place, many erroneous ideologies are erected to replace this noble institution. One of which is the social obligatory permit attached to it. This article sheds light on some of the reasons why marriage is not a social obligation. To have a good and healthy marriage, you need to put in the work.
Marriage is not a fantasy you create and expect to come to reality. Instead, it is the you yourself, in cooperation with your spouse, that creates the picture of marriage that you desire.
The following are reasons why marriage is not a social obligation.
Your Marriage Is An Investment Of Your Life
In marriage, you are investing yourself, which directly mean that you are investing your life. You cannot condense a part of you for social reasons and expect to flourish in your marriage. Just as a running tap does not withhold water and expect the bucket placed beneath it to fill up. When you enter into marriage with your half-self, where does love proceed from? Who takes up the responsibility needed for the marriage to thrive? Your squashed self? Half measure begets its like, half-measure.
The illusory notion that being with the “right partner” in the marriage setting, brings happiness, is a farce. This is because, every human being is a potential right partner. If you are not equipped, you cannot be a “right partner” for another person. The input in your marriage is directly proportional to your output.
Children Are Not Commodities
Many couples embrace marriage for the lackluster safety that marriage provides them. A ground where they can have legitimately have children. Children are not bragging rights. Subjecting a child to a life of peril for your self-serving reasons is an ill-reason to enter into marriage. This is selfish in the sense that you do not consider the life of the children. Instead, their value to you, is contingent on the satisfaction (status) they afford you. You cannot raise another if you are not standing yourself. This is considering your lack of wherewithal to help nurture another life.
Marriage is the giving of oneself and you cannot give what you do not have. All things considered, it is important to note that raising another life (parenting) is a sacred obligation which comes with grave consequences.
You Lack The Equipment Required For Productivity
Many marriages have come to a halt because neither of the parties is accurately equipped. When you treat marriage as another thing you have to do to fulfill all righteousness, it would crash before you like another thing that has to give way for peace to reign. Being intentional in a life commitment such as marriage and carefully making the choice with a sense of responsibility is paramount to building a successful union. You cannot put a cart before the horse and expect to make any progress.
Take time to invest in the tools you need for a productive life as well as a productive marriage.
Some people delude themselves into believing that they can separate their true selves from their marriage. And for this reason, many enter into marriage searching for what they cannot give themselves. One of those is contentment, which is often erroneously confused for happiness. This always ends up in frustration. Happiness is a by-product of contentment. Hence, your marriage cannot provide you happiness if you cannot generate it within yourself. Marriage as an entity does not have the capacity to generate happiness, it is only the people in it who can.
Therefore, expecting marriage to erode you of your problems is like investing in an expensive car and expecting it to provide you with your much-desired contentment. Marriage is not a social obligation, just as your life is not a social obligation. Treat marriage as another path to your life purpose and in it you will find fulfillment. It would also exist with productivity, enough to enhance your life.